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Special thanks to E.L., J.Y., R.A. and S.S. for this one.
10. Masturbate and come all over the place, just to see how hard you could squirt.
9. Hang out with the guys on Boys' Night, and find out what they really talk about when you're not around.
8. Go to a car dealership and get a quote on a car, and discover how much lower they mark it down for a man.
7. Announce to everyone that if women ruled the world, everything would be FANtastic.
6. See how much more heavy things you can lift with male strength-- like lifting a woman up and down on you when she's having sex on top or in midair.
5. Drink beer and enjoy your large bladder and possibly higher tolerance for alcohol.
4. Scratch your balls in public, like you're itching terribly, in front of other men to show them how horrible it is to watch, in the hopes of dissuading them from doing it themselves.
3. Find out how many women you can have sex with, using pickup lines you know won't be cheesy or degrading.
2 . Pee standing up, preferably while melting your initials into the snow.
1. Get a really, really long blow job.
Next week's:
Top 10 Things A Man Would Do If He Had ONE Day In A Woman's Body
July 31, 2009
Last week's:
Top 10 Euphemisms for Masturbation
July 10, 2009
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